Fellow Tiger fans, let's pick a new guy

Yesterday, while Jason Day was breaking records in the last golf major of the year, I was watching the Tiger's bullpen blow yet another game and a couple episodes of the X Files.  Why?   Because I do not have anyone to cheer for because I am clinging onto Tiger like an obsessed ex-lover who just cannot let go.  (It should be noted that, unlike many, I am not actually an ex-lover of Tiger).  The truth is he just does not have it going right now and it is time to cheer for someone new.  I used to pretend to be some kind of a purist who would watch golf without Tiger contending.  I was lying to myself and everyone else.  It is time to pick a new stud (that's one way to phrase that -Editor) and I would like to walk you all through my thought process.

First and foremost, I am going to narrow down the list to 5 guys.  These guys are all young and most have won majors.  I do not want to pick someone older, just to have to turn around and pick someone else in a few years.  I also do not want to pick someone who sucks (as compared to the other pros, I understand all PGA tour players are excellent at golf).

Candidate #1: Dustin Johnson

Photo courtesy of CNN and a non-major tournament

I like that he rockets to the top of the leader board, but I am not a huge fan of him never actually winning.  I also do not like or use cocaine, which could be a good or a bad thing considering he has cleaned himself up.  In the end, I am not as big of a fan of "comeback stories" as others are, especially when the comeback is from a series of completely self-imposed problems.

Verdict: Not my guy

Candidate #2: Jordan Spieth

First down!

This would be the obvious choice of a bandwagon to jump on.  He is fantastic.  And going with the front runner certainly is not the worst thing in the world.  He won the first two majors this year and was right there for the other two.  But he has one major downfall that may not be his fault at all.  It is the way people talk about him.  I cannot tell you how often I hear from golf commentators that he "looks like you want him to look", "does things the right way", and "respects the game".  What a crock of shit.  If this is what everyone "wants" then why does everyone love Tiger so much?  There is a small sect of golf fans who are glad this type of guy has supplanted Tiger, but that group is not nearly as large as they think they are.  Great player, good guy, but a tad too vanilla for me.

Verdict: Not my guy

Candidate #3: Rickie Fowler

One advantage Rickie has is he is the easiest player to spot if watching from 10,000 feet above the course.

There is nothing wrong with flamboyant, garish clothing and he gets paid a ton to wear it.  I just cannot keep up style-wise.

Verdict: Not my guy.

Candidate #4: Jason Day

Photo courtesy of BBC

The headline accompanying the above photo is "Jason Day: From Drunk 12-Year-Old To US PGA Champion".  Obviously, this boosts his case and he certainly has an advantage in our "prisoner of the moment" society.  He is Australian, which I am of mixed opinion.  Seems cool, cries a lot.

Verdict: Finalist

Candidate #5: Rory McIlroy

Curly hair is a major plus.

Depending on the font, his last name can look really cool when typed.  He is Irish, which I like.  But his best quality?  He is probably the best golfer in the world but ended 2015 with 0 for 3 in majors in which he played.  He also missed the British Open due to injury.  This means I am "buying low".  So when he wins a couple majors next year, I can be really proud of myself.  I just googled who his Premier League club is and am going to erase that from my mind.

Verdict: Winner

So Rory is my guy, but it should be noted that if Tiger even sniffs a major, I am dropping Rory faster than he dropped/was dropped by that tennis player.

Manic Monday (Guest Blogger- Crosby Jane Proctor)

Mondays are usually a fun time for me, but I just am not feeling it today.  I think it is mostly dad's fault.  He has a test coming up and was gone ("studying") most of the weekend.  He is being the BIGGEST BABY about the whole ordeal.  Honestly, I think it is a big ruse for him to get to eat out for every meal.  Sure, I will take a test too if that means Panera Bread, Starbucks, Burger King (x2), and Papa Johns pizza.  All the while the grass in the back just keeps growing and growing...someone please tell me how I am supposed to play back there.  Luckily, mommy and others salvaged some fun for the weekend, otherwise I am not sure I would know how to even deal with today.  

Fast forward to today.  I wanted some milk before I departed for school.  A reasonable request, right?  Well, dad responds with "just hang on a minute, you will get some milk at school".  How rude.  Next time he wants to drink a beer before we all go to the restaurant I am going to tell him "you don't need that, they will have beer at the restaurant".  Thankfully, mommy took the 30 seconds to pour me a glass of milk.  I finished it, we brushed teeth, and off daddy and I go to school.

On the way there I am forced to hear Drew Deener blather on about some sports something or other.  After about 10 minutes, but what feels like an hour, I am finally at school and I get to see my friends.  I was admittedly a little fired up and upon entering school I shoved one of my friends to the floor.  Whoopty doo.  Sue me (just a joke dad).  Of course, dad makes me say "sorry", which I did not feel was warranted.  Fifteen seconds later, I see another friend of mine carrying around a green basket that I want to play with.  I politely approach and attempt to take it away from her.  She starts to cry and of course I get told by dad to "let her keep it".  I did not think this was all too big of deal, but apparently it was enough to get my mug shot on the wall:

I do not have to tell you who was "watching me" when I fell and hit my face last weekend.

Wow,  it is only 9:30.  The good news is my day can only improve from here.

#Bonnafan

Over the past couple of days coach Petrino has been asked quite frequently about U of L footballs's QB situation.  I listened to his answers and I have seen the nice recruits coming in, but I have not wavered.  I am a #Bonnfan.  I have to stand strong, I coined the term!

Jacked & Ready, even helping children!  Photo courtesy of U of L sports.

I should be studying.

Something similar to this remains a possibility.

SPORTS NIGHT IN AMERICA

Reconciling the flashback will prove difficult, but it is a good problem to have.  ARE THERE ENOUGH BREWS IN THE WORLD?

8:00 USWNT v. Nigeria

Photo courtesy of NY Post

SO AMPED UP

9:00 Warriors v. Cavs Game 6

Photo Courtesy of Latin Times

JACKED BEYOND BELIEF

Leave Josh Rogers alone, or better yet, cheer him on

Last night Josh Rogers worked seven electric innings for the University of Louisville Cardinals in their eventual 4-3 super regional loss to Cal State Fullerton.  He exited with a 2-1 lead and inning after inning mowed through Cal State's lineup, including a highlight reel catch to end the sixth and back-to-back strike outs to end the seventh.  This is a good thing (at least for U of L fans) right?  Well you would think so, but you see Josh Rogers did something so terrible, so disgusting, that all of that goodwill was erased after he exited the mound at the end of the seventh inning.  I do not even know if I want to repeat it on my blog, but here goes...please do not repeat this to your children...he yelled for a few seconds in the general direction of Cal State Fullerton's bench.

Dealing

I simply do not understand why everyone, including U of L fans, seems to be piling on Josh Rogers for the way he exited the mound after getting a huge strike out to end the 7th.  He was FIRED UP, he was JACKED, he was AMPED!  Isn't that what we want?  We guzzle brews, dew and red bulls just to get that effect ourselves!  He yelled at Cal States Fullerton's bench and one of their assistant coaches (a grown man) completely loses his mind, runs on the field and screams at everyone, including the umpire.  What did he want the umpire to do...taze Rogers?  I apologize, but I do not see how, in a sport where adjusting your jock and spitting in the norm, someone can become so offended by a three second verbal spat with an opposing team's 21 year old pitcher.  And he is not the only one, even U of L fans are saying "I wish he would not have done that".  Boo Hoo.

Josh Rogers is one of our guys and should be treated as such.  He did not hurt anyone.  He did not make a dirty play.  He was excited and did something that was the slightest bit regrettable.  Please remember, Josh Rogers was the wining pitcher in Louisville's last two regional finals and he certainly is not to blame for last night's loss.  He is a guy who thrives in big moments and that, in turn, makes him excited.  We, as U of L fans, should support this, instead of turning into the moral authority and "conceding" that if he played for the other team (or UK) that we would be upset.  Who cares?  You know what, he does not play for the other team, he plays for U of L.  And please, for the love of everything holy, spare me the bullshit about him "showing the other side up" or even worse "upsetting the baseball gods" and thus somehow negativity affecting the outcome of the game.  Did Cal State Fullerton all the sudden decide to start trying to win the game at that point?  They got to U of L's bullpen, pitched well, and played superb defense.  Something tells me they were planning on trying to do that regardless.  Finally, Madison Bumgarner stared down and talked to the Royals' dugout (before the game was over) en route to one of the greatest World Series pitching performances of all time.  Where were the baseball gods then?  And how outraged are we now?  Fortunately for Bumgarner and Giants fans, the Giants went on to win, but that does not change the fact that the actions were similar.

All in all, I am probably still just upset about the loss.  But I am certainly not blaming Rogers, I am cheering him.  In an 11 inning loss, everyone wants to place blame.  I do not think this is a productive practice in general, but I certainly don't think the blame should be placed on some kind of mystical power summoned from three seconds of Rogers screaming at Cal State Fullerton's dugout.  Luckily for U of L fans, Rogers is just a sophomore and will be back next year, hopefully just as jacked.

Gym Notes

1)  Someone needs to explain to me the deal with picking the medicine ball up above your head and violently throwing it on the floor.  At some points, it seems like half of the gym is doing it.  I have no doubt it is a beneficial exercise, most of the people doing it are fairly winded.  I just wonder who made it up and how it became so popular so quickly.  

Possibly, somewhere in a Crossfit garage far, far away, an extremely amped bro was letting off some steam and took some aggression out on a medicine ball.  After a few reps, a movement was born.

2)  A tip: when you are trying to get The Cranberries "Zombie" on repeat (in order to get severely jacked), be sure to type more than just "Zo" in the search bar.  Otherwise, this will end up in the mix:

There is nothing wrong with some S & G in chill time, but it will stop a vigorous medicine ball floor pound session right in its tracks.

Special Day At Kroger

I have a new routine going.  I do the grocery shopping on Wednesday mornings.  Today, the fantastic Hubbards Lane Kroger is hosting some type of educational tour for managers of other stores.

Are you serious with this produce?

There are many perks to shopping right now.  A polite man asked me what size cart I want.  Those on the tour are making great effort to get out of my way. But the BEST perk is the vast array of samples.  There are samples everywhere, including Starbucks.  The only downfall is the amount of times I have been asked if I am "finding everything ok", but the advantages far outweigh the disadvantages.  

The store looks great guys!  Keep up the good work.  

Calendar of Events

For many, it has been a rough, long winter.  The impending snow storm here in Louisville is not making it any better.  It is for this reason that I am presenting a list a of upcoming events for everyone to look forward to:

MARK YOUR CALENDARS AND GET JACKED!

1)  March 15th: Selection Sunday

       Find out the path for your favorite college basketball team (or if they have one).  Plus, this means no more in-game Joe Lanardi predictions such as "if x team can hang on to beat y team it will help x team's tournament seeding and hurt Y team's resume".  Even for fans of teams on the outside looking in, this is a fantastic thing.

2)  March 19th-20th: Round 1 of the NCAA tournament (I know this is now technically round 2, but that is absurd and this is an upbeat post)

      I hope I do not have to explain why this is fantastic.  For God's sake, men get vasectomies so they can watch basketball all day and night instead of working.

3)  March 23rd- Oberon Release 

Summer in a bottle

4)  MLB Opening Day AND The NCAA Men's Basketball National Championship Game

       

        Crack a few Oberons and watch baseball all day, yeah that sounds like a hell of a plan.  Then, after you have had enough Oberons to stomach it, watch (in all likelihood) those Wildcats cut down the nets.  At least it will make my family and friends that are UK fans happy...this is what I am telling myself anyway.


5)  April 9-12: The Masters

       Watch as golf's greatest (except maybe Tiger) compete for the year's first major.  There is an added bonus if you are into slow motion zoom-ins on blossoming trees accompanied by pleasant piano music.

They play golf too!

6)  April 30- May 2: The NFL Draft

        This is for all of you "football only" types.  Feel free to "grade"(on the fly) the selections made by professionals with decades of experience who have invested countless hours researching the players.  If DeVante and Teddy are reunited, be prepared for the jacked meter to explode.

7)  May 2: The Kentucky Derby

       *Insert Hunter S. Thompson Quote*

8)  THE GREATEST SUMMER SOUNDTRACK EVER:

Mumford and Sons "Wilder Mind"- May 4th

Brandon Flowers "The Desired Effect- May 18

Florence and The Machine "How Big How Blue How Beautiful"- June 2

Nate Ruess Yet To Be Named Solo Album- TBD Summer 2015

Top 10 Players in the NBA/ Top 10 "Cheap American Beers" (#3)

Catch Up:
 #4-10

#3 Chris Paul & Anthony Davis/ Busch Light

Courtesy of http://cdn.fansided.com

I am sure many (both?) readers who have been following this countdown for over a year are wondering why I keep taking the liberty to list two players in a single position.  Well, my best explanation is that a lot has changed since I started this list and I lost the original piece of paper where I wrote down the top 10.  It may be pathetic, but this is what I am doing.  Not to mention it would be an absolute travesty to not have AD on the list, which he would not have been if I wrote all of this in anything approaching a timely manner.  He is on pace to have one of the great statistical seasons in the history of the NBA.  Chris Paul is still fantastic even though the Clippers are annually the equivalent of losing hot water during a shower.

I know that Anheuser Busch have been some horrible dicks of late to the craft beer community.  But that being said, I love an ice cold Busch light.  The flavor is better than its big brother: the un-ranked Bud Light, and it is less expensive.  I think the world would be a better place if most places you went there were street vendors selling cans of Busch Light for $1.  Street vendor makes a little money on the markup, purchaser gets an ice cold Busch Light for a reasonable price, and of course the can will be recycled.

Condensed weather report

Snowed like a mug & cold af